Unlocking Your True Self: Embracing Your Inner Child

If you've read my first book, "Leaf Lessons," you'll have glimpsed into the early chapters of my life and the trauma I endured.

It wasn't until well into my late 30s that I came to the realization that I had grown up in an abusive household. To me, it had been such a normalized existence, and I had no frame of reference beyond the life I had known. My past felt as though it were the standard experience, almost as if everyone went through it.

I didn't start realizing until my 30s that my life wasn't always like what others went through. I vividly recall an incident when I was spending time with a friend from my church, along with her young children, and her youngest, 2 years old at the time, had misbehaved and received a scolding from his mother.

The little boy started sobbing, fully aware that he had upset his mother and clearly feeling bad about his behavior. What struck me most, however, was what happened next. I watched in awe as this little boy rushed to his mother, the same person who had reprimanded him, and threw his arms around her neck, crying on her shoulder.

At that moment, I realized I had no inkling of what that sense of safety felt like. The ability to have a disagreement with someone, even a parent, or to be in trouble with them, and then seek solace from that very same person was an experience foreign to me.

Observing my friend and her son embracing each other and providing mutual comfort during their ordeal was a profound awakening for me. It struck me that this is what safety truly is. This is the essence of love. This is what it feels like to be acknowledged, heard, understood, believed in, and unconditionally embraced, without any expectation of needing to change or do anything differently to be accepted and cherished.

My body reacted strangely as I observed this, and I felt a longing inside me for that same kind of emotional connection the young boy was experiencing. Back then, I was still deeply committed to my Christian faith, constantly striving to be "good enough" in the eyes of God. I was weighed down by so much shame that I couldn't even view myself with a lens of love.

It took me quite some time into my healing journey to recognize how these patterns had developed in my life. They were rooted in the belief that there was no safety net or support system around me, and that love had to be earned or that I needed to attain a certain level of goodness to deserve any form of it.

In 2016, when I experienced my spiritual awakening, my understanding of myself, God, and the world underwent a profound shift. I didn't anticipate the series of events that unfolded in the wake of my awakening, nor did I expect to embark on a journey that involved letting go of many aspects of my life, including friends, jobs, and even my own sense of identity.

As challenging as it was to navigate these changes, I came to the realization that many of the things I had built my identity and life around were neither healthy nor supportive of my personal growth and well-being. Growing up, I had never learned how to set boundaries, so when I began to feel the need to establish them with others, it felt difficult. It almost felt like I was doing something wrong, or that I was becoming selfish and judgmental.

However, as I continued to push through the discomfort of healing and reprogramming my mind, inspired by the love I had witnessed between the young mother and her son, I started to understand that I not only desired such healthy relationships in my life but also wanted to extend that same love and compassion toward myself.

It dawned on me that the inner child within me had never truly felt the embrace of a love that was secure and unconditional. I felt a growing desire to introduce her to the concept of such love and demonstrate what it truly meant.

As I embarked on the journey inward to connect with my inner child, I began to discern her role in my life. I realized that she had been safeguarding me from emotional harm throughout my existence. There were numerous instances when she had shielded me from the love that surrounded me, all in an effort to shield me from the painful memories, experiences, and emotional bonds she had once associated with hurt.

The more I worked on healing this aspect within me—the pain that had kept me locked in a cycle of self-protection and prevented me from setting boundaries rooted in self-love—the more I recognized that this was also what had severed my connection with my higher self. As children, we are unburdened by societal programming, allowing us to connect with our authentic selves and spirits. Deep within me, beneath all the pain, lay a part of me that still held the truth about my identity, the unique gifts of my spirit, and the path to connecting with a power greater than myself.

I often reflect on the biblical verse that encourages us to "come like a child." In my awakened state, this verse took on a profound new significance, and I came to understand that it was through reconnecting with my inner child that I would rediscover my connection to Source Energy, my true self, and my inner reservoir of power, strength, and spiritual gifts.

The more my inner child healed, the more I found healing within myself, and the more I was able to reestablish a connection with my most authentic and elevated self. "Come like a child" didn't imply being small, hidden, or lacking wisdom; rather, it meant approaching life with an open faith. It meant believing that even when we make mistakes or veer off our intended path, there is always a guiding presence to set us back on the right course and embrace us with unconditional love.

This presence doesn't push us away or demand that we become someone different or "good enough" to be reunited with it. Instead, it lovingly leads us back to our truth, our higher self, and our genuine power and purpose in this lifetime.

Within the profound understanding of what true inner child healing entails and how deeply it reconnects us with our higher selves, it becomes evident that discovering our life's purpose can be as simple as granting our inner child permission to play, seek joy, and unearth the hidden talents within them. These talents serve as the bridge to guide us toward where we are meant to be and what we are meant to do as adults. The inner child possesses a wealth of wisdom if we take the time to engage with them. It is in the quietude of our concealed aspects that our most potent source of power resides.

Today, I urge you to set aside some moments to connect with your inner child. Embrace that little one within you, who is ever ready to welcome you with open arms, even in times of confusion and feeling adrift. Let that inner child wrap their arms around your shoulders, share their tears with you, and hold them close until they are ready to play once more. In doing so, they will once again illuminate the path toward your inner strength and higher self.